Chapter 442: Unable to Sever Kinship and Unable to Let Go of Love
writer:Emperor Song      update:2022-07-12 16:38
  Although he knew that things had developed to the point where he had to settle things with his mother, Li Li still found it difficult to make a decision.

  If one was not Li Li, one would not be able to understand his difficulties.

  Li Li couldn’t help but want to complain to Han Zhan. “Mr. Han, you’re not me. You haven’t experienced my life and can’t understand the pain in my heart. My mother has suffered too much for me. If I really draw the line with her, I can’t bear to. If breaking my arms and legs can change my family harmony, I’d rather cut my own hands and feet!”

  Han Zhan was an outsider. From the perspective of right and wrong, Li Li should indeed settle things with his mother. However, mother and son were the most inseparable intimate relationship in the world. Mother Li was indeed irrational when it came to Su Beibei. But when it came to Li Li, she was really willing to give her all.

  Seeing that Li Li was in so much pain, Han Zhan also felt troubled for him.

  Han Zhan patted Li Li’s shoulder forcefully and said helplessly, “Since you and Auntie Li are inseparable and you can’t draw the line with her, then let go of Beibei.” Song Ci was right. Su Beibei and Li Li should get a divorce. Otherwise, she would die of depression in the future.

  Li Li flew into a rage. “Let go? That’s my woman, the mother of my child, the woman who nearly died on the operating table for me! How can I let go! How can I bear to let go!”

  Li Li’s eyes were bloodshot.

  He covered his red eyes with his big palm and said hoarsely, “I won’t get a divorce!”

  Han Zhan’s face turned cold. “Then what can you do? Can you think of a solution to both? Auntie Li is your mother. The blood of both you and your mother is thicker than water. You can’t bear to disappoint her. Then there’s no choice. You can’t bear to let Auntie Li suffer, so you can only let Beibei suffer. You and Beibei have only known each other for two to three years. You can let go, right?”

  Li Li said, “I……”

  Not giving Li Li a chance to quibble, Han Zhan added. “You can’t! You can’t cut off family ties and can’t let go of love. But do you think a woman like Beibei will endure it for the rest of her life? If you continue to delay like this, it will only worsen the damage to Beibei. After all, you are husband and wife. Don’t make things difficult in the end.”

  Li Li turned a deaf ear to Han Zhan’s words. He was trapped in his own world and murmured repeatedly, “I don’t agree to a divorce. I love her so much. How can we get a divorce……”

  Seeing this, Han Zhan shook his head. “Song Ci is right. You really want to be a filial son and a good husband.”

  Li Li was covered in bruises from all the sarcasm. He questioned Han Zhan painfully, “As a son, I want to be a filial son. As a husband, I want to be a good husband. Is that wrong?”

  This time, it was Han Zhan’s turn to be speechless. After a long while, Han Zhan sighed. “You’re not wrong.”

  Hearing Han Zhan’s reply, two lights lit up in Li Li’s dark eyes. It was like a green sapling suddenly appearing in a desert.

  But this little sapling had yet to grow up when it was uprooted by Han Zhan. Han Zhan pointed out sharply. “If you want to be a filial son and a good husband, that’s naturally not wrong. But Li Li, you know very well what kind of situation your family is in. Your mother is already possessed now. She wants to walk down a dark path! If you want to be a filial son, you can’t be a good husband. If you want to be a good husband, you are destined to be labeled as unfilial.”

  “That’s all I have to say. Go and think about it yourself.” Han Zhan’s mouth was dry. He had to drink some water to moisten his throat.

  He went to the vending machine to buy two bottles of water. He unscrewed the cap and drank half a bottle before returning to the emergency room with the other bottle.

  Han Zhan handed the water to Li Li. “Here, drink some water.”

  Li Li didn’t look up but reached out to take the mineral water.

  Li Li unscrewed the cap and looked up to take a sip of water. He heard the emergency room door open.

  Li Li immediately put it down and stood up.

  The nurse changed her shoes and stood outside the emergency room. She shouted, “Where is Su Beibei’s family? Su Beibei is out!”

  “Here!” Li Li ran up to the nurse and looked behind her. “Nurse, where’s my wife?”

  The nurse answered, “Coming.”

  Li Li heard the sound of wheels and tiptoed to look inside. He saw a nurse pushing a operating table slowly out of the corridor.

  “Beibei is out!” Li Li said to Han Zhan, “Quick, push the bed over.”

  The operating table could not be pushed out of the operating theater. Li Li had already retrieved the hospital bed from the hospital and was waiting for it.

  Han Zhan went to get the bed, while Li Li eagerly waited for Su Beibei to come out.

  Finally, Su Beibei was pushed to the emergency operating theater.

  Li Li hurriedly looked at Su Beibei.

  After escaping death, Su Beibei was only left with one breath. She laid quietly on the bed, her face pale and her breathing weak. She gave Li Li the illusion that the person lying on the bed was not a living person but a corpse.

  Li Li couldn’t even resist secretly reaching out to check if Su Beibei was breathing. Feeling a weak breath, Li Li swallowed his heart.

  The nurse saw Li Li’s actions and told him, “It’s okay, the anesthesia hasn’t completely worn off. The patient is now unconscious and her breathing is naturally lighter.”

  Li Li nodded and murmured repeatedly, “It’s good that you’re fine. It’s good that you’re fine……”

  Han Zhan pushed the bed over and worked together with Li Li to carry Su Beibei, placing her gently on the bed.

  The nurse sent Su Beibei to the ward with them.

  After returning to the ward, Li Li followed the nurse’s instructions and kept calling her name to wake her up.

  After five to six minutes, Su Beibei slowly woke up.

  She opened her eyes and glanced at Li Li, before her lips moved slowly. She said something, but her voice was muffled and Li Li couldn’t hear her clearly.

  Li Li lowered his head and placed his ear by Su Beibei’s lips. He heard her say, “Neil, Neil won’t cry……”

  At this moment, Su Beibei was still thinking about the child. She was worried that the child would cry if he knew that she was injured.

  Li Li’s heart ached.

  He hurriedly grabbed Su Beibei’s cold hand and told her, “Beibei, you’re fine. You’ll get better. Neil went to eat and didn’t cry. Don’t worry.”

  Su Beibei couldn’t tell who was talking into her ear. Her mind was filled with Li Ao. She was so afraid that she would die. If she died, what good days would Li Ao have with Li Li?

  Li Li was still young and he would marry again sooner or later. If the child had a stepmother, it was equivalent to having a stepfather. Moreover, he had a grandmother who hated him……

  Su Beibei was suddenly very afraid of dying. She was afraid that if she died, Li Ao would have no one to dote on.

  Tears streamed down Su Beibei’s face and onto her neck.

  Li Li hurriedly wiped her tears with his fingers and asked tenderly, “Beibei, does it hurt a lot?”

  Su Beibei said, “Neil……”

  “Neil……”

  Han Zhan’s heart was breaking when he heard Su Beibei’s calls. “I’ll call Song Ci and ask her to bring Neil up. Beibei might want to see Neil.”

  “Okay.”

  Song Ci quickly ate her fill. Seeing that Li Ao was so distracted that he didn’t want to eat, she picked up Li Ao’s bowl and personally fed him.

  After finishing half a bowl of rice, Li Ao didn’t feel like eating anymore. “Auntie Song, I’m full.”

  This was not Li Ao’s appetite. He ate too little.

  Song Ci scooped a bowl of soup for Li Ao and said, “Have some more soup then.”

  “Mmm.”

  Li Ao was holding a bowl and drinking soup when Song Ci’s cell phone rang. She hurriedly picked it up. “Han Zhan, is Beibei out?”

  Li Ao instinctively twitched his ears when he heard his mother’s name.

  Han Zhan told her, “She’s already awake and keeps calling out Neil’s name. After eating, bring Neil up for her to see and reassure her.”

  “Alright!”

  Song Ci was very happy to hear this news. She waited for Li Ao to finish his soup before telling him, “Neil, your mother is already out!”

  Li Ao hurriedly jumped down from the stool and said, “I want to visit Mother!”

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  “Okay.”

  When Song Ci and the auntie brought Li Ao to the ward, Su Beibei was still unconscious, but she no longer called Li Ao’s name.

  Li Ao saw Su Beibei and hurriedly ran over to hug her arm.

  He was very short and was just slightly taller than the bed. Li Ao stood on tiptoe to see Su Beibei’s face. He realized that his mother’s face was especially fair and abnormal. Li Ao instantly cried.

  He cried. “Mother! Mother!”

  Su Beibei heard Li Ao’s cries. She opened her eyes weakly and stared at him for a while. As if recognizing the child, Su Beibei said intermittently, “Neil, Neil, don’t cry. Mother won’t abandon Neil……”

  Li Ao cried even harder.

  “Mother, Mother, don’t die. Neil wants Mother!” The child could say whatever he wanted. Li Ao was most afraid that his mother would die.

  Su Beibei kept calling Li Ao’s name as tears streamed down her face.

  Li Ao kept crying. His cries were a form of condemnation for Li Li. Li Li felt upset as he listened.

  Li Li couldn’t stand it anymore. He hurriedly took away Li Ao’s hand that was grabbing Su Beibei and stuffed him into Song Ci’s arms. “Sister-in-law, please help me send Li Ao home to rest.”

  Song Ci hugged Li Ao and said gently to him, “Neil, Mother is already awake. Mother really won’t die. Can I bring you home to sleep? When you wake up, Mother will be better. Come and visit Mother tomorrow, alright?”

  But when Li Ao heard that he was going back to sleep, he was very afraid. He didn’t know how to describe his feelings. It was a fear of losing his mother after he woke up.

  Li Ao grabbed Song Ci’s hand and looked up at her. “Auntie Song, can I sleep at your house?”

  Han Zhan really wanted to remind Li Ao that he should call Song Ci Aunt, but seeing Li Ao’s face full of tears, he controlled himself.

  Song Ci guessed that Li Ao was afraid and her heart ached. She hurriedly rubbed Li Ao’s head and agreed. “Of course you can. Come back with us now.”

  “Okay!”

  Han Zhan said to Li Li, “Then we’ll bring Li Ao back first.”

  “Mmm.”

  Song Ci held Li Ao’s hand and looked up to tell Li Li, “When Beibei really wakes up, remember to call me.”

  “Alright, I will call.”

  The two of them spoke calmly, as if they had already forgotten their previous confrontation. But whether they forgot or not and whether they could forget, only each other knew.

  After everyone had left, Li Li pulled the stool to the side of the bed. He sat down, grabbed Su Beibei’s cold hand, and placed it by her cheek. He couldn’t help muttering, “You’re only worried about Neil. Haven’t you thought of me?”

  Li Li was not jealous of his son. He just felt sad.

  How deeply had Beibei been hurt that she would rather call her son’s name than his name at the most painful and torturous moment?

  Li Li felt extremely defeated.

  “Beibei, I will treat you well for the rest of my life. I will treat you well. Believe me.” As he spoke, Li Li couldn’t help choking up.

  –

  On the way back, Song Ci and Li Ao sat behind while Han Zhan drove.

  There was a pregnant woman and a two-year-old child sitting in the car. Han Zhan drove rather slowly, only about 30 to 40 yards an hour.

  Li Ao hugged a pillow in the car and leaned his head on Song Ci’s lap.

  Song Ci’s fingers stroked Li Ao’s cheek from time to time. The child’s face was smooth and tender, as if she was caressing a boiled egg. It was especially smooth.

  Song Ci kept touching it.

  “Auntie Song Song.” Li Ao called Song Ci softly.

  “Mmm?” Song Ci looked at Li Li’s exquisite and adorable face and stopped caressing it. She asked curiously, “Neil, what are you thinking about? Can you tell Auntie Song?”

  Li Ao asked, “Auntie Song Song, what’s a divorce?”

  Song Ci looked very stunned.

  Han Zhan couldn’t resist turning to look at Li Ao.

  Han Zhan was extremely shocked to hear this from a two-year-old. He stared at the front of the car and asked without turning back, “Where did Neil hear this from?”

  Han Zhan thought that Li Ao had overheard Su Beibei and Li Li’s private conversation.

  But Li Ao’s next answer shocked Han Zhan. Li Ao said, “Every time Father brings me to Grandma, Grandma always tells me that Father and Mother will get a divorce.”

  Song Ci instinctively looked over at Han Zhan, who happened to be looking back at her. Their eyes met, and they frowned at the same time.

  They only knew that Auntie Li and Su Beibei couldn’t get along, but they didn’t know that Auntie Li had said such things to Li Ao in private.

  Li Ao placed the pillow in his arms. He didn’t know what a divorce meant, but he knew that a divorce was definitely a very bad thing.

  “Auntie Song Song, what exactly is a divorce?” Li Ao had to understand the meaning of this word today.

  Song Ci couldn’t bear to tell Li Ao the truth, but Han Zhan was ruthless.

  He said bluntly, “Divorce means that your parents will live separately in the future and can’t live in the same house anymore.”

  With that, Han Zhan turned to look at Li Ao. Seeing that Li Ao’s fair little face was frowning, he asked again, “Do you understand what Uncle said?”

  Li Ao remained silent.

  His little head turned quickly. In the end, he seemed to understand Han Zhan’s meaning and nodded thoughtfully.

  Li Ao said, “After the divorce, we can’t live together anymore. We’re not family anymore, right?”

  Han Zhan hesitated for a moment before nodding. “Mmm.”

  Li Ao couldn’t accept this fact. He felt that Han Zhan was lying to him and insisted on hearing Song Ci’s answer. He looked at Song Ci eagerly and asked, “Auntie Song Song, is what Uncle said true?”

  Song Ci’s heart ached.

  She harshly nodded and told Li Ao, “Neil, what Uncle said is true.”

  Hearing this, Li Ao’s expression changed and he looked like he was about to cry. He grabbed Song Ci’s arm and asked in a scared tone, “Then do I not have a home? Do I become a child that no one wants?”

  Thinking of something, Li Ao looked terrified. He suddenly sat up, grabbed the pillow uneasily, and said with tears streaming down his face, “Then will I be sent to the orphanage?”

  Song Ci hurriedly pulled Li Li into her arms.

  Afraid of hurting the baby in Song Ci’s stomach, Li Ao instantly stopped moving. Even his cries became softer.

  Such a sensible child!

  Song Ci’s heart was breaking.

  She patted Li Ao’s head and told him, “No! You won’t be sent to the orphanage. Neil, your parents love you very much. They will never abandon you and you will never, never be sent to the orphanage.”

  Li Ao’s face was filled with tears as he cried innocently and pitifully. “But if I don’t have a home, I will be a child that no one wants! They all say that a child that no one wants will be sent to the orphanage!”

  “Auntie Song Song!” Li Ao grabbed Song Ci’s dress tightly and cried sadly. “Can my parents not get a divorce? I don’t want to lose my home.”

  The world of children was so simple. He felt that home was very important. No matter how exciting and fun it was outside, he had to go home when it was dark and hungry.

  If his home was gone, where could he return to in the future?

  No one could answer Li Ao’s question.

  Song Ci was soft-hearted after all. She couldn’t bear to see her child so upset, so she told a white lie. “Neil’s parents are very loving. They won’t get a divorce. Neil will always have a home.”

  Li Ao seemed to believe Song Ci’s words. He stopped asking questions and sat obediently beside her. But he kept hugging that pillow in his arms and the tears on his face never stopped. ……

  Han Miao and the rest knew that Li Ao was coming. They were supposed to sleep at 10pm, but they waited until 10.40pm.

  During this period, Han Jun was really sleepy and couldn’t take it anymore. In the end, she still climbed into bed and fell asleep.

  Instead, Han Miao was very excited at the thought that she would be able to see Brother Li Ao soon.

  Han Miao had been losing weight recently and had already started to see results. Her thighs looked much thinner and she was not so fat in a dress.

  Han Miao couldn’t wait to show off her weight loss results to Li Ao.

  She couldn’t fall asleep, so she pulled Yan Qingxiu to play dominoes in the living room. Han Miao made a circle in the living room, and she didn’t allow Yan Qingxiu to push down the dominoes.

  Yan Qingxiu pretended to be curious and asked her, “Then who are you building such a big circle for?”

  Han Miao pouted and corrected Yan Qingxiu. “This is not a circle. This is a heart!” Han Miao pressed her chest and said, “It’s the shape of my heart.”

  Yan Qingxiu stood up and sized up that irregular-shaped ‘heart’. He asked Han Miao, “Why did you build a heart shape?”

  an Miao sat down on the carpet and stared at the bone cards sadly. “Mother said that Neil’s mother got into a car accident. Neil is very sad.”

  She looked up again and smiled sweetly at Yan Qingxiu. “I piled my heart out for Neil. I hope he can be happy!”

  Yan Qingxiu felt like laughing but also felt comforted by Han Miao’s sincerity. He purposely teased Han Miao and said, “Miaomiao, do you like Brother Neil?”

  Han Miao blushed and stammered. “Hey, what did you say?”

  Yan Qingxiu asked, “Does Miaomiao like Neil?”

  Han Miao placed her hand on her ear and asked loudly, “What did you say? I can’t hear you!”

  Yan Qingxiu:”.……”

  Yan Qingxiu said, “I said that Neil is so ugly!”

  Han Miao immediately retorted. “No way! Neil is so handsome! Auntie Dong, it’s your eyes that are not good.” Her childish retort was very adorable.

  Yan Qingxiu looked at her in amusement and lifted her ear. “Can you hear me now?”

  “Hmph!” Han Miao kicked the ground and shifted her butt. She turned her butt and back to Yan Qingxiu, looking angry.

  Yan Qingxiu stared at Han Miao’s “honest” back view and found it funny.

  The world of children was really interesting.

  Yan Qingxiu heard the sound of a car and reminded Han Miao, “Miaomiao, your Brother Neil seems to be here!”

  Han Miao suddenly stood up and sprinted to the garage like a small cannonball. There was still a distance from their dormitory to the garage, so Han Miao ran for three to four minutes before reaching the garage.

  When she arrived, Han Zhan had just parked the car.

  Song Ci pushed open the car door and alighted with Li Ao. Li Ao had just stabilized himself when he was hugged by Han Miao, who was running over.

  “Neil!”

  The two of them were only two months apart, but because Han Miao’s appetite was much better, she was slightly taller than Li Ao.

  Li Ao felt difficulty breathing as Han Miao hugged him tightly. “So tight……” Li Ao reminded Han Miao to let go.

  Han Miao released Li Ao and lowered her head to hold his hand. She smiled and told him, “Neil, don’t be sad. Auntie Beibei will get better.”

  For the first time, Li Ao felt that Han Miao’s voice was really nice.

  Please speak more if you can speak!

  Li Ao nodded. “Mmm.”

  Seeing that Li Ao was still unhappy, Han Miao said happily, “Neil, I’ve piled up dominoes for you to play with. Come with me, alright?”

  Li Ao was not in a good mood, but he still obediently followed Han Miao to the resting building.

  Song Ci stared at Han Miao’s trembling braids and said to Han Zhan, “Miaomiao is a happy fruit. With her by his side, Li Ao will soon forget what he asked previously.”

  Han Zhan nodded and said to Song Ci, “Go take a shower and rest early. I’ll go visit them.”

  “Okay.”

  Li Ao was pulled into the living room of the dormitory by Han Miao. Han Miao pointed at the heart-shaped dominoes on the ground and told Neil, “I’ve built a heart for you. If you play with my heart, don’t be sad, alright?”

  Hearing Han Miao’s childish voice, Li Ao, who was originally uninterested, nodded reluctantly. He knelt in front of the dominoes and asked Han Miao, “Can I really play?”

  Han Miao nodded.

  Yan Qingxiu stood aside and said sourly, “Kid, you are very fortunate. She didn’t even allow me to touch the cards I worked so hard to build for her.”

  Li Ao thanked Han Miao and reached out to push the pile of bone cards.

  With a gentle push, the bone tablet fell. One fell, another fell. This cycle continued until the last one fell.

  Li Ao watched as all the cards fell. He stared at the first card that fell and said something that didn’t match his age. “If only the first card didn’t fall.”

  Han Zhan happened to hear this when he entered. He asked Li Ao, “Why?”

  Li Ao picked up that card and sized up the bone card in his hand. He said seriously, “If it doesn’t fall, they won’t.”

  But some people and some things, a single wrong step would lead to many steps of mistakes.

  Han Zhan was about to comfort Li Ao when Han Miao pulled Li Ao to play another game.

  Han Miao brought Li Ao to her and Han Jun’s playroom. Han Miao told Li Ao, “Neil, my sister is asleep and she will let you play with her toys. Don’t be unhappy, alright?”

  Li Ao asked, “Why didn’t you let me play with yours?”

  Without thinking, Han Miao answered honestly, “You played mine. What should I play?”

  Li Ao pushed his luck and lied to Han Miao. “If you let me play with yours, I will be happy.”

  Han Miao hesitated again and again before finally giving her limited edition Barbie doll to Li Ao.

  At this time, Li Ao was very good at deceiving Han Miao. When he grew up, he even took steps slowly and successfully abducted Han Miao, this silly girl, into his household register.

  Li Ao only fell asleep on Han Miao’s bed at midnight. Han Zhan carried Han Miao to Han Jun’s bed.

  Han Zhan was about to return to his room when he received a call from Li Li.

  “Mr. Han, Beibei is already awake.”

  Han Zhan acknowledged and instructed Li Li before returning to his room.

  Song Ci was troubled and didn’t sleep well.

  Han Zhan pushed open the door and woke Song Ci up. Song Ci turned on the wall lamp and saw Han Zhan standing under the door. She said, “Why didn’t you turn on the light?”

  Han Zhan said, “The lights are blinding.” In other words, he was afraid that the blinding lights would wake up the sleeping Song Ci. Han Zhan was a meticulous person and was even more attentive when taking care of Song Ci.

  Song Ci turned on all the lights. She leaned against the head of the bed and told Han Zhan, “I can’t fall asleep. I keep thinking about Beibei.”

  As Han Zhan took off his clothes, he told her, “Li Li just called and said that Beibei is already awake. You can rest assured.”

  “That’s good.”

  Han Zhan came out of the shower and saw that Song Ci was still awake. He asked, “You’re not planning to sleep tonight, right?”

  Song Ci said, “I am going to the competition next week. I really can’t bear to part with you.” Due to Li Ao’s influence, Song Ci thought a lot. She stared at Han Zhan and said worriedly, “Han Zhan, don’t find a mistress just because I am going to participate in a competition……”

  Han Zhan met Song Ci’s cold eyes. He was both angry and amused. “Bring out your pride as the top socialite. With you, who else can enter my eyes?”

  Song Ci snorted and muttered, “If there’s the top socialite in Wangdong City, there’s naturally also the top socialite in the capital and the top socialite in Binjiang……”

  “I heard that the number one socialite in the capital is elegant and graceful. She’s a stunner in the world. I know I’m very beautiful, but I’m tired of the same dessert after eating it for too long. You can also be tired of seeing the same face. I’m just worried that you want to change your taste.”