Editor: Speedphoenix

  “Well girls? It’s time to kick back, relax, and enjoy the festivities!” I spoke in a cheerful tone as I walked through Regighihegg’s streets wiith Enne and Leila in tow. The first of the two girls was walking by my side with her hand in mine, while the other trailed a few steps behind us in a manner reminiscent of a guardian.

  My bright demeanor stemmed from two sources. The first the fact that the city had gone into holiday mode. You could practically feel the festive spirit oozing off its citizens as they happily strolled about. Now that I had completed the preliminaries, I too could join them in enjoying the celebration that was Destia Trome.

  The second contributor to my mood was my wallet. Or rather, the wallet that the demon king had lent me. It was loaded, which meant that, by proxy, I was too. I could splurge on anything I wanted, and I wouldn’t be losing a cent. Free sh*t best sh*t.

  “Let me know if you see anything that catches your eye, Enne. You can have anything you want.”


  “Anything?”


  “Yeah, anything!”


  She stopped for a moment to scan her surroundings before knitting her brows. “I can’t pick. There are too many options.”


  “You seem to be enjoying yourself, My Lord.” An exasperated smile surfaced on Leila’s face.

  “That’s ‘cause I am,” I said. “I mean, why not, right? The whole point of an event like this is to have fun, so I’m doing exactly that.”


  Destia Trome was the first celebratory event Enne had ever experienced. I wanted her to enjoy it. I wanted to turn it into something she’d remember for years to come. Yeah, that! I’m totally not just dicking around ‘cause I wanna have fun. Ahahahaha…


  Man, I kinda regret not bringing everyone. I really want all the other kids to be able to experience this kinda thing too. I know it’s probably not the safest thing, but it’s honestly not really all that dangerous either. It seems safe enough around here for me to not be on edge about something happening to them. And having Lefi around would pretty much guarantee that everyone ends up just fine. Now that I think about it, maybe I was just being a bit too overprotective. Ehhh… nah. Things were getting pretty hairy with those bandits when we were still on our way over. They were launching arrows at us, so who knows what could’ve happened. Yeah, fuck it, I was right the first time. Having fun is important, but safety comes first. Plus, everything falls apart with the whole Lefi not wanting to come thing. Not having her around makes things a lot more dangerous. Why didn’t she want to come anyway? She said something about it being a case of bad timing and whatnot, but is that even really a thing? Like, what does bad timing even mean when all she does is laze around all day in the first place?

  “Oh forget it. I’ll just ask her when I get back.” I muttered under my breath in a low tone before turning back towards Enne. “So? You see anything you want?”


  “I want to try that.”


  The sword girl pointed towards a stall that seemed extremely popular with children in particular. Dozens of the little buggers were gathered around it and screaming with delight as they shot magical bullets at targets that looked like soft, glowing balls of energy.

  “What is that anyway…?”


  “That would be a popular carnival game, My Lord,” said Leila. “It requires two types of enchanted items. The first employs illusion magic to create targets, while the second fires low power projectiles. It costs very little to set up, so you often see at least one at every major event.”


  Her description led me to recall the shooting range-like carnival games that we had back on earth. Is it just me, or does this world’s version actually look a hella lot better? The targets move, and the whole thing seems all bright and flashy ‘cause of all the magic. It looks way more interesting than the old cork guns we were stuck with. Damn. And here I was thinking that my old world’s tech would always come out on top. TIL not to look down on this world’s tech advancements.

  “Sounds good. Whaddya say we give it a shot?”


  “Mhm!” Enne nodded as she started walking in the shooting range’s direction.

  ***

  The afternoon came and went. Enne, Leila, and I enjoyed the festivities to our hearts content. We basically participated in everything that caught our attention. It was an eventful day for sure, but apparently, it was far from over.

  “L-Leila!? Is that really you, Leila!?”


  An unfamiliar voice prompted all three of us to turn around right as we began contemplating dinner.

  “I-It really is you! You were ok!? I’m so glad!”


  The voice’s source was a girl with goat horns. The robe she wore was about as loose as robes got, and yet, it did nothing to save her from giving off the impression that she was tiny. She was only the slightest bit taller than Enne. If I was to slap a grade on her, I would have said she was somewhere between seven and nine. She was too old to be in primary school, but she didn’t quite look big enough to be in her mid or late teens just yet.

  The most notable thing about her wasn’t the fact that her horns kind of looked like Leila’s, nor the fact that she was too small for her oversized robe, but rather, her expression. Her jaw had dropped to the point where I thought it might be unhinged. Her eyes were so focused on Leila’s face that I suspected they might have started firing lasers.

  “It’s good to see you again too, Emyu.” The dungeon’s resident demon girl replied in her usual, nonchalant manner. Unlike the other girl, she didn’t come anywhere close to overreacting.

  “Someone you know? I can already tell she seems pretty attached to you.”


  “Yes. She is something along the lines of a sister to me. I used to tutor her when I worked in the demon realm.”


  Something along the lines of a sister…? I guess that means they’re close, but not actually related? I see… so that probably means she’s like her protege or something.

  The girl she had called Emyu almost seemed to be overcome with emotion. She began running over with tears in her eyes—only to come to a sudden stop the moment she realized that Leila wasn’t alone.

  “W-Wait, you have a daughter!? When did that happen!?” Her eyes practically popped out of their sockets. “And why are you dressed like a servant!?”


  Evidently, she had mistaken Enne for Leila’s daughter and overreacted as a result.

  “Alright, let’s just calm down.” I understood that she was confused and overwhelmed by all sorts of different emotions, so I spoke in as gentle a tone as I could manage in order to avoid putting her on guard. “Take a deep breath a—”


  “H-How dare you! You couldn’t just stop at stealing her chastity! You had to humiliate her by dressing her up as a maidservant of all things and forcing her to attend to you! What sort of cruel, sadistic pervert are you!?”


  “Hey Leila? You mind doing something about her? This uh… ‘sister’ of yours seems to be having a bit of an aneurysm.”


  “I’m sorry, My Lord, but there isn’t much to be done. Unfortunately Emyu happens to have an overactive imagination.”


  Yeaaaah… I can kinda see that.

  “W-Wait, why is he a Demon Lord!? What’s something as horrible as a labyrinth’s overlord doing in the middle of town!?” She took a few quick steps back as her wariness shot through the roof.

  The way she reacted to each and every little thing was a trait that I found endearing in its own right. The impression I got from her was very much akin to the kind you’d normally get from a kitten.

  “Wait, you can tell?” I cocked an eyebrow. “Oh yeah, that reminds me, you could tell back when we first met too, right, Leila? Is it really that obvious? I always assumed no one knew, but I’m starting to feel like I might’ve been walking around with my fly down the whole time.”


  “Our race happens to be especially well attuned to detecting that sort of thing, and we’re inherently skilled in analyzing our findings.”


  Huh… That’s weird. Now that I think about it, Leila certainly has always seemed abnormally sharp. Doesn’t look like it’s being caused by a skill either. After a bit of internal banter, I reached the conclusion that Emyu likely shared Leila’s acuity and left it at that. Though uh, looks like she’s a biiiiiiit lacking on the analysis front. Maybe she’s just outta practice?

  “O-Oh no! I get it now! He must have worked you to the bone and forced you to abide by his every whim no matter how tired or humiliated you were! And then, when night came, he must have dragged you off to his bedroom and made you attend to his desires all night long even though you were already completely drained by the grueling work he put you through during the day! That’s just horrible! I’m so sorry, Leila! I’m so sorry you had to go through all that!”


  Bruh. Hold up. Is it just me, or is she going further into the deep end? Oh, and in case any of you were starting to doubt me, I am NOT a registered sex offender. Clapping cheeks without consent isn’t my thing. Just saying.

  “…Excuse me. You’re wrong.” Enne stepped forward to come to my defence.

  “W-what do you want? This has nothing to do with you!” stuttered shortstuff.

  “I’m Enne. That’s my Master,” she pointed at me before shifting her finger in Leila’s direction. “Leila’s our friend. She’s not my mother.”


  “Really…? So you’re not Leila and the Demon Lord’s kid?”


  “No. I’m not. And Master doesn’t do mean things like that.”


  Enne linked arms with me for emphasis as she nodded. Oh man, just look at her! Her expression hasn’t changed at all. Totally adorable/10.

  “That’s not possible! Demon lords don’t have a shred of intelligence! They’re basically incarnations of lust and stupidity, and the only thing they ever do is abide by their most primal desires! There’s absolutely no way that anything that brainless could possibly keep its loins in check in the face of Leila’s beauty!”


  Alright, let’s get a few things straight. Yes, Leila is literally one of the hottest girls I’ve ever seen in both my lives. Like sh*t, she turns heads. Like. Lots of them. I’ll admit, if I didn’t know her and I happened to pass her by, I’d probably turn around and stare. Because let’s be honest, who wouldn’t want a piece of that ass? Anyway, back on topic. Yes, Leila’s hot as fuck. Yes, I pretty much do whatever the hell I want. But that doesn’t mean me doing her is going to happen. ‘Cause uh, yeah. That sounds like an idea that would get Lefi to set me on fire and almost turn me a pile of ash before tearing me limb from limb, and burying my disembodied corpse somewhere deep in the Wicked Forest. Yeah, uh, no. I kinda don’t want to never be seen or heard of again, so I’mma keep my dick to myself, thank you very much.

  One thought prompted by the contemplation of Leila’s beauty was that all of the dungeon’s girls were in fact top tier. Each was more than attractive enough to make even supermodels shy away in shame. Maybe we should start an idol group. Might as well have ‘em function as a unit and compete for the top spot. I could be their producer, and we could spend our days struggling through the melodrama we call life…


  “Mmmrph…” Enne puffed out her cheeks. “Master isn’t like that.”


  “She’s right, Emyu. You’re being terribly rude,” said Leila. “I’m serving him of my own free will in order to repay him for his kindness.”


  “N-Not you too, Leila!”


  I shook off the delusion I was having and started paying attention to the conversation again, only to realize that the sheep-horned girl was scolding the other.

  “I see…” she stuttered apologetically. “I’m sorry. I always assumed that all demon lords were evil and stupid. That was really rude of me.”


  Wow. She pretty much apologized the moment she realized she was in the wrong. Colour me impressed. People as sincere as her are pretty hard to come by.

  “Don’t worry about it, short stuff. I get it, you were just worried about her.”


  “I’m sorry for all the troub—wait! Did you just call me short!? How dare you! I knew it, I knew demon lords and intellectuals could never get along! We were doomed to be mortal enemies from the very start!” she screamed. “I’m not short! I’m just not fully grown yet! I’m going to look just like Leila one day! I’m going to be just as tall, and my chest is going to be just as big!”


  “…Mmrph. Master’s enemies are my enemies.”


  “Fine! Bring it on! I’ll destroy anyone that sides with the likes of a demon lord!”


  Emyu’s body tensed up in a manner reminiscent of a hissing cat while Enne took up a stance with a non-existent blade.

  As the situation was both amusing and bizarre, my lips twisted into a bit of an exasperated smile.

  “Alright you two. Rein it in. It’s time for dinner, so how about we go grab ourselves something to eat?”