Editor(s): Speedphoenix, Joker

  “Heya Yuki, it’s been a while,” said a certain, very annoying twink . “How’ve you been doing?”
“Mind explaining why I’m talking to you?”
I had rushed all the way back into the dungeon and over to my workbench only to find myself greeted by a voice belonging to someone who was very much not Nell . Much to my dismay, I recognized the person in question . It was Phynar, the king of the demon realm .

  “Well you see, I really wanted to sit down and have a little chat with you, and the hero was nice enough to let me borrow one of her items to do just that . ”
His explanation was followed by a much more familiar and less irritating voice confirming the claim .

  “Hey Yuki . I’m sorry about how sudden this is, but we really need your help,” said Nell . “Would you mind talking to the Demon King for just a little? He’s much better than me when it comes to spelling out the details . ”
“If you insist……” I grumbled .

  “Wow, you two are so cute together! I always did find your relationship to be a bit of an odd one . It isn’t everyday that you hear about a hero marrying a demon lord, after all,” said Phynar . “I’m glad to see you’re every bit as dedicated as she says you are . ”
“I’m hanging up if you don’t shut it . ”
“Oh, you silly thing, it was just a joke,” chuckled Phynar . “Now, I think I better get to telling you about our current circumstances . You see, I’m with the King Reiyd of Allysia, and Queen Napholahz of the Elves right now . We’re all together, having ourselves a nice little chat in the elven lands, but then the big bad fiends attacked us . I’m sure you know them, after all those scuffles you’ve had with them, over the past year or so . ”
A certain obnoxious, red-headed demon came to mind almost immediately .

  “As much as it pains me to say this, they’ve gotten the better of us,” he said, regretfully . We managed to hold them off so far, but they managed to put us in check . ”
Huh . I guess this is what Nell meant when she mentioned the expedition she had to go on .

  “And how, exactly, did they do that?”
“Well, you see, they happened to unleash an incredibly powerful monster just outside the city we’re in,” Phynar said .

  “Get to the point . ”
“It’s an undead dragon . ”
“A what?”
The comment drew the attention of the fair lady standing next to me . The way she furrowed her brow demonstrated that she was everything but pleased to hear the news .

  “I’m guessing that’s exactly what it sounds like, right?”
“Yup! They dug up a dragon’s corpse and brought it back to life as a member of the undead . It’s not as strong as it was when it was alive, but if we were to try poking at it, it’d burn the whole forest down, along with everyone in it . And we can’t have that . ”
Of course the fiends are still desecrating corpses . What else is new?

  While a politician may have found the idea of an undead army to be nothing short of ideal, I thought of it as blasphemy, a sin even worse than shitting all over the graves of those used in its creation . Even as someone with no real stakes in any sort of religion, the act of pure evil repulsed me . I used to like zombie movies back when I lived in Japan, and I’m pretty sure I still do, but that’s only because I know they’re works of fiction . Real zombies are just…… wrong .

  “I believe you’ve killed an adult dragon before, so would you mind lending us a hand? We’d really like to avoid as many casualties as possible, and naturally, we’ll be paying you a king’s ransom, given that three monarchs’ lives are at stake . ”
“.……Okay, I think I see what the issue is . You mind letting me talk to Nell for a bit?”
“Of course not,” said Phynar, in a sing songy voice . “Nell, he’s calling for you . ”
I had a hard time imagining that he was really in dire straits given how cheerful and stress free he sounded .

  “What is it, Yuki?”
“Phynar said something about you guys being attacked . Are you hurt anywhere?”
“Nope, I’m just fine! As a demon lord’s wife, there’s no way I could possibly get hurt when the only thing they’ve done is come at us half-heartedly . ”
Given how full of energy she sounded, I was rather inclined to believe that she wasn’t just trying not to make me worry .

  “Alright . You can let Phynar know that I’ll be heading over immediately . ”
“Okay . And uhm…… I’m really sorry about getting you involved . ”
“Don’t worry about it . Doing an extra chore or two to get my precious little wifey out of a tough spot is no concern of mine at all . ”
That’s what it means to be family .

  “I more or less know where you guys are because of the orb’s tracking function, but I’ve never actually gone there before . How long do you think it’ll take me if I fly?”
“Uhm…… The village is just a bit south of the demon realm, so I think it’ll probably be two or three days . ”
“Alright, see you in two then . Take care of yourself . Don’t do anything risky, okay?”
“Okay! Thanks Yuki, I love you!”
With that, the crystal faded, and all sound from the other side cut off .

  “Alright girls, you heard her . I’m going to go get my stuff ready and head out . ”
“I shall accompany you,” said Lefi . “It is best that I am present if there is a dragon, even should it be a mere raised corpse . ”
“Thanks,” I said, quietly, before turning to Leila and Lyuu . “Keep an eye on the house for me, alright?”
“There ain’t nothin’ to worry ’bout, Master! As a family, we’ve gotta help each other out when we’re in trouble, and I’m ready to get my part goin’! Ain’t that right, Leila?” said Lyuu, with her fists pumped .

  “Of course,” said the more reliable maid . “We should be fine on our own, but we’ll get in touch if anything happens . ”
After nodding in thanks, I used farspeak to instruct my pets to head back to the grasslands and got my preparations underway .

  ***

  “And I believe that, my friends, means we have our tickets out of this mess,” said Phynar, with an ever friendly smile .

  “I had no idea he was a demon lord……” muttered Carlotta .

  “Really? I thought the two of you had met . And more than once, at that,” said Phynar, his eyes open wide in surprise .

  “We have, but I was never made aware of his identity, and we refrained from probing,” said the paladin . “We saw no point in it . He’s a valuable ally, and earning his ire would be no different from spearing ourselves in the foot . ”
“That certainly does explain that,” said the king with a chuckle .

  “Uhm…… Carlotta, I uhmmm……”
A rather nervous Nell did her best to try to find the right words to say to her superior, but it was to no avail .

  “Don’t worry about it,” Carlotta sighed . “I understand why you didn’t say anything, and I knew he had every intention of hiding his identity, given his frequent use of masks . I have no particular comments to make given the extent to which he’s helped us . And I’m fairly confident in my deduction that His Majesty was already well aware . ”
“I was,” admitted Reiyd . “I’m sorry for not telling you earlier . It would have been rather…… inconvenient if his identity was leaked, given that he was and still is the man who saved our country . ”
“That, I certainly agree with . I’m not fond of the idea of another major political conflict so soon after we resolved the last,” said Carlotta . “I’ll do us all a favour and pretend I never heard anything that was said today . ”
“Thank you, Carlotta,” said Reiyd .

  “Thanks Carlotta!” echoed Nell .

  “.……I have to admit, that was one of the biggest surprises I’ve had in quite a while . ” The paladin smiled awkwardly . “Though, it would certainly explain how absurdly powerful he is . ”
Once Carlotta was done talking, Queen Napholahz approached Nell with a brief curtsy .

  “We thank you, hero,” she said . “With Our arm missing, the elven military would have lost much of its potential . We must show you Our gratitude by repaying this debt in full . ”
Her comment came as a result of one of Nell’s actions . The brunette had used one of the many high grade potions Yuki had given to her to restore the monarch’s lost limb .

  “There’s no need for you to repay me, Your Majesty,” said Nell . “All I’d like is for our people to get along better in the future . ”
“We understand . ” Napholahz nodded, then turned to Reiyd . “It appears that you possess a rather potent ally, King of Allysia, and now, a significant advantage at the table of negotiations . ”
“To be honest with you, Napholahz, I am struggling to come up with a suitable reward for her myself . The potion she administered was her own property . ”
“A struggle We empathize with . It is certainly no simple task given the item’s value . Shall We provide you with an article of Our own?”
“If I am to be honest, I would rather refrain,” said Reyid with a troubled smile . “To request that of you would be to give up a notable advantage . ”
“It appears that Our ploy has been uncovered . Whatever shall We do now?”
Napholahz laughed heartily, then turned to the third monarch at the table .

  “Phynar, We wish to know more of the blade that Our assailant employed . What of its properties are you aware?”
“We don’t know everything just yet, but we’re fairly certain that it’s Tortund Ruin, a cursed weapon that may as well be a calamity in and of itself . It’s been a long time since it last showed up in the records . The crown’s changed hands four times since then . ”
“Four? Then these records of yours, they tell tales of a time one thousand, seven hundred years past?” asked the elven queen .

  Her words led Nell to realize that the tale was one even older than Lefi .

  “Yup, you’ve got the time frame just about right,” confirmed Phynar . “The greatsword sucks up all the blood and resentment of everyone it cuts and uses it to grow even stronger . That part isn’t all that strange . Most cursed weapons are more or less the same . ” He frowned . “The problem with Tortund Ruin is that it puts all the others to shame . ”