118 Everyone’s Heartache

  secretdreamwishes

  “Fall asleep?” Feng Xia Qi and the others sat in the cold and silent courtyard of You Nian Pavilion, asking Feng Yi Xuan who just came out of the pavilion.

  “En!” Feng Yi Xuan sat down. At first, he wanted to watch Nian Nian rest but thinking that everyone was here and that he still had some questions to ask, so he came out.

  Gui Yi Zi already left. It seems he went to Zhen Wei Pavilion to find something good to eat. At this time, in the courtyard, there were only Gui Yi and the other brothers, as well as Feng Yi Xuan and the rest of them. Lan Jian Jun did not leave. The only thing he wanted to do was to know more about his daughter, so he can make up for the past.

  Feng Yi Xuan’s eyes were deep pools, gathering thousands of huge waves. Those bottomless depths looked at Gui Yi and the other brothers, the intention was self-explanatory. He wanted to know about the pain Lan You Nian suffered in the past.

  Gui San took a drink from the flagon and began to recall the past, “Shifu found little junior sister in the snow under a cliff. At that time, I only thought this little girl was really pitiful, so young yet she’s been thrown down this cliff with so many grave injuries as well as suffering from so many poisons!”


  “Do you guys know?” Gui Er seemed to be a little drunk as he shouted, “Little junior sister never uttered a word for half a year, even when suffering from poison, even when she was placed into the medicinal bath by shifu to cure the poison, she didn’t utter a sound. We even thought little junior sister was mute!”


  “How could this be?” Lan Mo Xian mumbled with pain. His little sister actually wouldn’t talk for a while. Just what painful things has she encountered that she couldn’t even speak?

  The table of people picked up their wine cups and started to drink alcohol. They all felt distressed for this slumbering girl. In their hearts, they silently told themselves they must protect this girl.

  “Then what happened later? How did Nian’er meimei talk?” Hua Mu Qing looked at Gui Yi and the others with tears running down her cheeks, her hands gripping onto Lan Mo Xian’s clothes, afraid she will cry out loud. She always thought she was the most pitiful, without her parent’s protection, but now she knew, in this world, there were so many painful things pressed against Nian’er meimei, what cruel things, how can such a small girl endure it?

  “Afterwards?” Gui Si laughed, putting down the wine cup and gazed at the bright moon in the sky. He seemed to reminisce about something, “In a heavily raining night, little junior sister had a nightmare that made her scream and suddenly run into the rain……”


  Gui Si seemed to remember his past heartache and didn’t know how to continue, gulped down a mouthful of wine as he continued, “Such a small child standing in the rain, laughing out loud, that laugh made people feel heartache. We would rather little junior sister will cry, but even as she madly laughed in the rain, she didn’t shed a single tear.”


  “That was the first time little junior sister started to speak in six months. The first thing she said was calling shifu.” Gui Wu remembered the past, a smile was on his lips though it was sad, “I think, for little junior sister, shifu is like her grandfather who protects her, so she will speak!”


  “No, for Nian’er meimei to speak, it’s because of all your love. For Nian’er meimei, you guys are very important to her!” Jing Wu An analyzed. He really didn’t expect such a smart and wise girl will have such a past.

  “Fortunately Nian’er meimei met you brothers, otherwise……” He Chu Yang said with fear of what might have been. If Nian’er meimei didn’t meet Gui Yi Zi, didn’t meet Gui Yi and the others, there probably won’t exist a girl named Lan You Nian in the world.

  “It should be us who are fortunate to have such a little sister. Ever since little junior sister came, the Medical Valley is a lot more fun. We have a different lifestyle!” Gui San said, holding his folding fan. If they didn’t meet little junior sister, they would always be studying those flowers and plants in the Medical Valley all their lives. How would they be able to do things they liked to do? Experiencing a different life.

  “Then her poison?” said Lan Jian Jun who hasn’t spoken for a long time. His already aged face became even more aged, his white hairs have also increased in a night, those wise eyes were already bloodshot, his voice was hoarse and unpleasant.

  “Little junior sister’s poison is derived from the many poisons on her body. Shifu has studied this poison for many years and was only able to prepare half the antidote” Gui Yi’s gaze was a bit bleak. He who usually didn’t touch wine at all drank a few cups. Because of little junior sister’s poison, it made them senior brothers all helpless, made them feel miserable and helpless.

  “This poison awakens once every month, every time this poison is heart-wretching painful. Little junior sister must survive each time, otherwise……” Gui Yi didn’t say the words die, but everyone present knew Gui Yi’s meaning.

  “How has Nian Nian lived through it for so many years?” Feng Yi Xuan’s purple eyes were as cold as the ice that never melts in a thousand years, chillingly frigid, the killing intent in his eyes was like endless streams of rivers, little by little gathering into the vast sea.

  Gui Si glanced at Feng Yi Xuan. Now they have this man who is probably the man little junior sister liked. They had to say little junior sister’s eyes were really good. This person, no matter what aspect, he was the best, he was just a bit too cold.

  “En, for many years, little junior sister always grits her teeth and goes through the poison again and again” Gui Si looked at Feng Yi Xuan, “Little junior sister has a much more difficult time than anyone!”


  “Nian’er meimei has spent her years like this in the Medical Valley?” Yu Liu Li frowned. He didn’t expect that there was such a woman in the world, encountering such a tormenting pain yet was still as strong as ever. He had to say he admired as well as felt heartache for this little sister.

  Gui Wu shook his head, “Don’t you know little junior sister is Miss Miao Yin? Little junior sister has been wandering for years!”


  “She’s so young, you guys don’t follow her to protect her?” Feng Xia Qi said with slight distress, that girl, how can that girl not make others feel heartache for her? Letting him who always indifferent to everyone else feel anguish for her. He will use his greatest ability to protect this girl, protect her happiness.

  “Why wouldn’t we want to follow little junior sister to protect her? But little junior sister’s temper, you guys know. If she isn’t willing, what can we do?” Gui Er was angry as he said this, “So little junior sister wandered outside for many years, every time she comes back, she is always injured!”


  “Pa~!” The wine cup Feng Yi Xuan held in his hand was ground into powder, trickling down through his fingers, but this can’t eliminate the pain in his heart.

  “You like little junior sister?” Gui Yi asked Feng Yi Xuan. The paper window between them wasn’t broken (idiom: everyone might know the truth, but no one ever said it out loud). When Lan Jian Jun and the others heard Gui Yi’s words, they all looked at Feng Yi Xuan.

  “Not like, it’s love!” Feng Yi Xuan’s voice was still cold, but when talking about Lan You Nian, there was a special kind of gentleness.

  Gui Yi reached out a hand, prepared to slap Feng Yi Xian’s shoulder. Feng Yi Xuan’s body shifted, ready to leave but remembering that these people protected Nian Nian, made Nian Nian safe, Feng Yi Xuan didn’t move, letting Gui Yi’s palm to smack against his shoulder. This was a handing over of responsibility between men.

  “I can tell little junior sister is different with you,” Gui Yi said with joy. Even though he always hoped the man in little junior sister’s heart is him, but as long as little junior sister was happy, it didn’t matter who it was.

  “There is something hidden in little junior sister. It is something still very painful. I think that those things are even more upsetting for little junior sister than the physical pain of the poison!” Gui Yi revealed all he knew to Feng Yi Xuan. He hoped this man can guard by little junior sister’s side.

  “What do you know?” Feng Yi Xuan asked, but there was no hostility in his tone.

  “I only know little junior sister has nightmares very often. I don’t know what her nightmare is for it to torment her for so many years. I know when little junior sister wakes up, there is something wrong with her. That is a kind of desolation from deep within the bones” Gui Yi glanced in the direction of the pavilion, “But I can tell little junior sister is much happier with you, so……”


  “I understand!” Feng Yi Xuan finished and flew into the pavilion, leaving a table of people with different thoughts but equally worried.

  Gui Yi and the others glanced at the pavilion and left one by one. Gui Wu headed towards Ming army. After all, he only took a day off. It was time to go back.

  Lan Mo Xian and Hua Mu Qing supported Lan Jian Jun who almost couldn’t walk back to his courtyard.

  Feng Xia Qi and He Chu Yang respectively returned to their own manors. The happenings of tonight made them lose sleep until dawn.

  Jing Wu An and Yu Liu Li left, heading towards Xiao Jin Pavilion. Tonight, they must have a good drink, for that girl who made people’s heart ache.

  When Feng Yi Xuan returned to the pavilion, he headed towards the bedside and sat down, looking at Lan You Nian who was laying there. She was lying there quietly, but that bearing that was pure and graceful, without a stain of dust, so otherworldly made anyone who saw her hold their breath, afraid she was just a beautiful illusion of their hearts.

  Thinking that in a situation he didn’t know about, in a place he couldn’t see, Nian Nian suffered so much hardship, Feng Yi Xuan felt heartache, as if his whole heart was being gripped by someone, painfully drilling into his heart.

  “Finished discussing?” Lan You Nian opened her eyes with a smile. Although every time her poison awakens, she was frail, but her vigilance hasn’t disappeared.

  “En,” Feng Yi Xuan took off his outer coat and plunged into the blankets to pull Lan You Nian into his arms as if his chest was born for this girl, so it would fit so perfectly.

  Feng Yi Xuan landed a kiss on Lan You Nian’s neck, gently with deep affection, a heart-aching tone “Sorry!”


  Sorry, I didn’t meet you earlier to protect you. Sorry, I wasn’t with you when you were in pain. Sorry, I let you suffer so much.

  Lan You Nian deeply breathed in Feng Yi Xuan’s scent and felt at peace. She knew Feng Yi Xuan’s meaning, but she was even more touched by his love. Perhaps she really liked and is proud of this man, she liked him more than she even thought she did. Otherwise, how could she start to rely on him? She felt this broad embrace had a calming effect as if this stable embrace can block all the wind and rain, can also block hidden arrows and spears, even when the winds change, and the heavens fell, there was no need to be afraid.

  Lan You Nian saw Feng Yi Xuan’s unparalleled face getting near her, the next moment, thin as blade lips fell on her lips, like a peerless painter, meticulously depicting her lips, an unprecedented warmth that made Lan You Nian forget even the wound on her lips for a moment.

  Feng Yi Xuan did not deepen the kiss, only licked the wound on Lan You Nian’s lips, an unprecedented heartache and sincerity, making Lan You Nian’s cold heart as warm as spring.

  Lan You Nian stretched out the arm that wasn’t injured and wrapped around Feng Yi Xuan’s neck, returning Feng Yi Xuan’s kiss. She can feel Feng Yi Xuan was shocked, then happily crinkled his eyes.

  After a kiss, Feng Yi Xuan smoothed Lan You Nian’s breathing. His forehead leaned against Lan You Nian’s forehead, said firmly, “I won’t let you leave me.”


  “Good!” Lan You Nian replied. If she really can cure the poison, then how nice would it be to be with this man.

  Late into the night, Lan Jian Jun’s courtyard was still brightly lit. Lan Jian Jun sat in the room by himself drinking. As a father, he felt a heartache he never felt before. He didn’t expect that his daughter suffered so much because of his negligence. At this moment, he decided no matter what daughter wanted to do, he will support her no matter what. Anything else wasn’t important anymore.

  “Mo Xian, uncle* he……” Hua Mu Qing murmured worriedly.

  “Ai, there’s no use if we go in,” Lan Mo Xian held Hua Mu Qing’s hand, “As an older brother, I’m so useless!”


  “No, Mo Xian, as long as you take good care of Nian’er meimei in the future, we will all protect Nian’er meimei!” Hua Mu Qing said.

  “Alright!”


  *Uncle as HMQ calls LJJ is a general term that you called an man of your parent’s generation; this title usually implies that you know this person rather than a greeting to a stranger (differentiation isn’t relevant to the plot so I left is simply as uncle)