There were only two months remaining before the truce ran out.

  If Ling Qi had not gained the ability to defend herself by then, things would go poorly for her. She needed every single advantage she could get. Passing Elder Zhou’s test was her best hope for advancing quickly, but that did not mean that she had to place all of her hopes on it. Ling Qi was sure that Elder Su’s lesson on qi loci was meant as a hint that the mountain held sites of power that could enhance cultivation. The trouble was that she couldn’t afford to waste time wandering around the mountain at random. Time was a precious resource even with her new ability to cut her sleep time in half.

  But did she need to do it alone? No. Thinking about the problem, Ling Qi quickly came up with an alternative. She would need to get Li Suyin and her roomate to agree to help her. After receiving her monthly supply of spirit stones, Ling Qi hunted down Li Suyin in the crowd.

  “Li Suyin,” she called out, raising a hand to get the other girls attention.

  The smaller girl stopped walking, turning in surprise to face Ling Qi. “Ling Qi?” Li Suyin asked, glancing nervously at the crowd. “Did you need something?” She sounded befuddled; Ling Qi was not the one who approached typically.

  “I have an idea,” Ling Qi said as she stopped near the other girl, scanning the crowd for a messy mop of bushy hair. “I need to talk to your roommate too…… Su Ling, right?”


  Li Suyin’s eyebrows rose. “What? Why?” she asked, even as she followed Ling Qi back into the crowd.

  “You remember the lesson we were talking about before and finding something for ourselves?” Ling Qi replied vaguely, not wanting to be exact with so many people around. “I think Su Ling can help give us a good lead.”


  Li Suyin was falling behind, too polite to weave through the crowd properly. After a moment’s hesitation, Ling Qi caught the girl’s hand in her own to keep them from being slowed down. “.…… I do not think that is the best idea,” the blue-haired girl hedged uncomfortably, glancing down at their hands. “Su Ling is very…… private. I am not sure she will take well to the idea of being a guide.”


  Ling Qi was glad Li Suyin was sharp enough to pick up on her intentions so easily. “Maybe, but it can’t hurt to ask,” Ling Qi responded impatiently. Spotting Su Ling’s bushy head through the crowd, she gave Li Suyin’s hand a tug. Their target was quickly moving away. “We all stand to benefit here. She didn’t seem

  unreasonable.”


  Ling Qi barely registered the scholarly girl’s incredulous look. Li Suyin followed anyway, clearly resigned to being pulled by Ling Qi. Given their hurry, the two girls’ passage was anything but subtle. It came as no surprise to Ling Qi that the animalistic girl noticed their approach.

  Su Ling’s pointed, furry ears twitched in agitation as she glanced back and scowled. “Oh. It’s you again. What do you want?” She turned to face Ling Qi and Li Suyin with her arms crossed, ignoring the people forced to go around her.

  “I wanted to offer a deal we can both benefit from,” Ling Qi responded carefully, keeping her eyes fixed on the feral girl’s to avoid appearing weak. “It’d be better to talk away from the crowd,” she added. No one seemed to be paying attention to them, but Ling Qi knew better than to take that at face value.

  Su Ling narrowed her eyes, looking from Ling Qi to Li Suyin then agreed. “Fine. Come on then. I know a good place.”


  Ling Qi glanced back at Li Suyin, who smiled nervously.

  “Sure. Lead the way,” Ling Qi responded confidently. She wasn’t worried about conflict yet; not while the Elder’s decree was still in effect. They followed Su Ling out of the plaza and toward the training fields. Si Ling’s ‘place’ turned out to be a small clearing in the lightly wooded cliffs that surrounded the path further up the mountain, a decent distance from the actual road.

  “So?” Su Ling asked archly as she came to a stop in the middle of the clearing. “If this is just some dumb trick to get me alone, you’re gonna regret it.” Su Ling flexed her bony fingers, drawing attention to her sharp black nails.

  “I would not help someone trick you like that,” Li Suyin mumbled from behind Ling Qi, sounding hurt.

  Su Ling glanced at the short girl with a complicated expression and then huffed. “Not on your own, but I’m pretty sure you’d cave in real quick to a threat,” she said mercilessly before turning her attention back to Ling Qi. “So what do you want?”


  Ling Qi frowned as Li Suyin stared at the ground, shoulders hunched. Su Ling was even blunter than Ling Qi was. While it was true that Ling Qi wasn’t sure that Li Suyin could be trusted in the face of pressure, there was no point in saying it straight to the girl’s face. “The two of us are going to search the mountain for a qi locus,” Ling Qi said. It was a little gratifying to see someone else wearing a blank look of incomprehension for once.

  “It’s a location filled with potent qi that lets you cultivate faster.” Ling Qi figured Li Suyin could explain in more detail later if Su Ling wanted to know more.

  Su Ling continued to regard Ling Qi suspiciously. “Yeah? Good for you. What does that have to do with me?”


  This would be the hard part, Ling Qi knew. She took a deep breath, drawing on her experience convincing fellow gutter urchins to play patsy for more complicated thefts. It shouldn’t be hard, right? She was even intending to treat honestly this time. “The first thing you should know is that we aren’t just searching around at random. Elder Su all but said there would be places like that on the mountain.” Ling Qi felt confident that this was true. “And Li Suyin has a really good feel for qi. It’s why we’re cultivating together.”


  “I’m still not hearing a reason why this should involve me,” Su Ling said dryly, but Ling Qi could see that she understood where this was going. The girl wasn’t dim. “I’m not interested in letting Li Suyin paw at me like you do. I like men.”


  Despite her focus, Ling Qi stuttered for a moment and flushed slightly. The absurd accusation simply came out of nowhere.

  “It’s not like that at all!” This was enough to finally break Li Suyin’s shell of meekness. A glance confirmed that Li Suyin had gone red with embarrassment. “There’s no need to be so rude and to imply something vulgar about our study sessions, you…… you ruffian!” Li Suyin angrily pointed a trembling finger at Su Ling. “Is it really so difficult to just be polite!”


  Su Ling and Ling Qi blinked almost in unison at the other girl’s outburst. Su Ling seemed slightly bewildered.

  “Whatever,” Su Ling finally huffed. “It was just a joke. Make your pitch, will you?” she added, sounding troubled.

  “.…… Right,” Ling Qi cleared her throat, deciding to ignore the awkward atmosphere. “The point is spirit beasts supposedly congregate around these places. We were hoping you would show us where you’ve been hunting. In return, you can use the place too when we find it. You might stumble on it on your own, but we’ll all waste less time looking together.”


  Su Ling bared her teeth, but as she glanced between Ling Qi and Li Suyin again, a low uncertain growl escaped her throat. After a moment, she scuffed her foot against the grass, looking frustrated. “.…… Fine. Beast cores and elixirs aren’t letting me keep up alone anyway,” Su Ling grumbled. Jabbing a finger at Ling Qi, she added, “You aren’t allowed to talk about my hunting spot with anyone else though. Swear it.”


  Ling Qi shared a look with Li Suyin.

  “I swear I won’t mention your grounds to anyone else,” Ling Qi said. It was an easy enough thing to promise. She even meant it.

  “I swear as well,” Li Suyin said. “Um, sticking together will benefit all of us, right?”


  Su Ling grimaced, her tail flicking back and forth. “When are we doing this?”


  Ling Qi sighed. Now came the really hard part. Scheduling.

  Once they had hashed things out, they agreed to meet again a few days after the Elder’s test. Ling Qi and Li Suyin headed off to their spiritual lesson, and then afterward, back to Li Suyin’s hut. There, sitting in silence save for the breathing of the other girl in front of her, Ling Qi found herself losing track of time as she cultivated. The energy of a fresh spirit stone pulsed in her hands, filling her dantian with warmth.

  The core of spiritual cultivation was the expansion of one’s dantian. It was an oddly relaxing exercise. The feeling of rough stone beneath her faded, the whistling of the wind through cracks in the stone faded, the warmth of Suyin’s hands on hers faded, and even her nagging worry about the coming test faded. All that remained was her heartbeat and the pulse of her qi, slowly rising in tempo as she circulated the stone’s qi and assimilated it into her own.

  Today, there was a feeling of constriction, like being forced into a pair of shoes a size too small. It only grew worse as she continued to cultivate. Ling Qi felt her breathing hitch and her heartbeat grow erratic as a great weight seemed to press down on her from every direction. She knew somehow that if she just ended her circulation, the feeling would end. She almost did…… But something in her rebelled at the idea of giving up and at allowing herself to be restricted.

  Hadn’t she suffered worse to do what she wanted? Endured freezing nights and an empty belly for years on end? Risked death or worse as a young girl living on the street? Would she really give up and be held down by just a little pressure? No. Ling Qi would be free in the end, no matter the trial, no matter what she had to sacrifice to obtain it.

  The pressure vanished like a dam burst by floodwater.

  Awareness returned to her, along with all of her doubts and thoughts, shattering the moment of utter clarity she had just experienced. Even as she opened her eyes and smiled weakly at her excited partner, accepting Li Suyin’s praise and congratulations at breaking through to the Middle stage of the Red Realm, that final thought lingered.

  Was that really who she was when everything else was stripped away?

  Somehow, it made her feel a little hollow.

  Threads 10

  all

  ***

  Ling Qi remembered blood and death. She remembered men and women screaming, begging for their lives. She remembered killing them.

  She retched. Her throat burned, and she tasted bile on her lips as she forced herself to to her hands and knees, scrabbling in the cooling dirt as her eyes stung with tears. She almost threw up in truth when she saw her surroundings.

  Wreckage stretched as far as her eyes could see. She saw ruined huts and houses and torn-up streets, and everywhere, she saw bones and meat. Glassy eyes and empty sockets stared at her from all around, full of accusation and mockery. An endless graveyard, a charnel house, is what greeted her here.

  “You are not one of mine.”


  Ling Qi’s head snapped up at the sound of another voice, cold and dispassionate. In the shadow of a shattered doorway stood a figure shrouded in black. She was unassuming in stature, little more than a scrap of shadow amidst the graveyard. Her long black hair, matted and tangled, hung to her knees and shrouded her face, and yet, when the figure lifted her head, Ling Qi glimpsed only white bone and a burning red light in an empty eye socket.

  Ling QI let out a strangled laugh that was more of a sob. It was crazy that she could recognize what this was so easily. The fear that had shackled her when she met the King was worn to tatters now.

  “Why? What was this supposed to teach?!” she shouted at the Bloody Moon. “What was the point?!”


  “There wasn’t one,” Sixiang muttered bitterly. “Sorry, Ling Qi.” To her surprise, she felt their slender arms wrap around her shoulders. Were they still in a dream then? “I failed. I didn’t see this bitch’s fingerprints all over this memory until it was too late.”


  For her part, the Bloody Moon was unperturbed by the rudeness shown by the two of them as she moved closer. “You have been coddled, child, if you imagine that all or even most things hold a native purpose. It is the duty of humankind to forge meaning from the blind mechanics of the world.”


  Ling Qi shook in impotent anger. She could still taste blood in her mouth. She could still hear the wails and cries of the dying. She could still see the terrible, viridian light shining forth from the keep as a horned corpse had been flung from the broken battlements while greenery consumed the survivors. Roots and flowers and crawler vines had erupted from everywhere, tearing and……

  She took a shuddering breath to control herself, resting a hand on Sixiang’s. “Please. No cryptic speech,” she gritted out. “What do you

  ?”


  The burning red light in the spirit’s eye socket flickered, and the moon avatar raised a hand, wet and red with blood, to cup her jaw. “I wished to inform you that there will be no further offers. You are not one of mine.”


  “I’m glad,” Ling Qi spat before she could even think twice, “if

  is yours.” The graveyard looked back at her, empty and stinking of rot.

  The Bloody Moon stared at her, but Ling Qi was too exhausted and too sick to feel fear at the ominous weight that her gaze held. She could feel Sixiang’s arms tighten around her shoulders.

  “Vengeance is blood washed away with blood,” the spirit replied, skull vanishing behind black tresses as she dropped her hand and turned away. “This is its true form, the only ending it can ever bring. Vengeance is the claw lashing out in pain, the bloodied fist crushing a foe’s skull to paste in the throes of grief, before its owner is slain in turn.”


  As the avatar of the great spirit stepped into the shadows, she looked back, and beneath her tangled tresses, Ling Qi saw not a skull but the face of a steely-eyed matron of stern and unforgiving countenance. “Justice is something only humans can define. If you disapprove, then do not merely complain. Act – as you did not today. It is such a troublesome mantle your kind has saddled me with.”


  Ling Qi closed her eyes. She just…… didn’t have the energy to decipher what the spirit was trying to say right now.

  “I’m sorry, Ling Qi,” Sixiang said, voice muffled by her hair. “I’m a crappy friend. I shoulda been able to figure out that this was one of her butcher plays. I shoulda paid more attention. I could have asked around, even if she was hiding her mark.”


  “And

  should have been more careful with the map,” Ling Qi said with a bitter chuckle. “I could have cross-referenced it with the archive or…… something. I got cocky, too. I just hope Shen Hu is okay.”


  As the graveyard faded away around them and the warmth and weight of Sixiang’s body dissolved away, Ling Qi could only regret.

  When she opened her eyes, she winced at the brightness of the early afternoon sun.

  “Oh, you’re awake.” Shen Hu’s voice drifted over her, and she immediately turned her head to where he kneeled in the grass beside her.

  Her eyes were immediately drawn to the twisting scar across his belly, red and fresh. It looked like he had been gored viciously. It had been a lethal wound by all measures.

  He scratched his cheek nervously as he saw the direction of her gaze. “I messed up,” he admitted.

  “What happened?” Ling Qi asked faintly, turning her gaze back up to the sky. She still felt dazed.

  “Well, we were evacuating,” Shen Hu explained, turning somber. “Lanhua dug out a shelter and started on a tunnel real quick, but all these spirit beasts came bursting through the shelter roof. I couldn’t hold them off long enough, even with the choke.”


  “You should have run. They weren’t even real. What if you had actually died?” Ling Qi asked without heat.

  Shen Hu frowned. “If I would run now in a test, why wouldn’t I run later in real life? Besides, it was a good lesson. I spent all of last year alone, ‘cept for Lanhua. It made me forget a lot of stuff that matters. Today, I saw what it looks like when we fail. People depend on us cultivators. I never want to see that again.”


  “At least one of us found a lesson in this,” Ling Qi muttered. She had only been given doubts.

  “Yeah, I don’t get it. I messed up, but the spooky lady at the end seemed happy for some reason,” Shen Hu said, scratching his head in confusion.

  Ling Qi’s gaze snapped back to him, and his blank stare met her hollow one.

  “.…… Where are we anyway?” Ling Qi asked dully.

  “Down in the valley. Looks like we found a site at least,” Shen Hu replied, gesturing to the other side of her.

  Ling Qi lolled her head to the other side, and there, she saw a tumbled field of stones overgrown by moss, which seemed to form a vague square. Going by the qi around the stones, it would probably be a useful site for both her and Shen Hu, moon for her and earth for him.

  This hadn’t been for nothing. But Ling Qi could still taste the blood on her tongue.

  ***

  “I do not believe your choices were in error.” As Bai Meizhen spoke, Ling Qi looked up from her lap to glance at her friend. “Except for entering the situation to begin with.”


  Meizhen was seated neatly beside her in the audience box overseeing the challenge arena. She was glad that her friend had reminded her that she needed to be here today. She had lost track of time in cultivating, plagued by doubts and frustrated with the sluggish response of her qi as she tried to build toward the next stage. Meizhen had quickly perceived her distress, and eventually, Ling Qi had disclosed the events of the dream.

  “I would have thought you’d agree with the Bloody Moon,” Ling Qi sulked, resting her chin on her hand, only to wince a moment later. Those were ill-thought-out words.

  Meizhen frowned at her. “Cease that,” she said. “That creature is a great spirit, and its words hardly condemned you. That is not what is troubling you.”


  Ling Qi grimaced but agreed. “Have you see people die like that before? I just…… I can’t……”


  Her friend turned her eyes to the challenge arena below where the equipment was being set up. Heavy desks and shelves of tomes were being dragged out and arranged in artful symmetry.

  “I have,” Bai Meizhen replied. “Observing records of battles is part of a young Bai’s education, and I have seen the aftermath of towns lost. Grandfather did not coddle us in ensuring that we know our duty.”


  “Heh. Are the Bai really not so heartless after all?” Ling Qi asked, trying to put the images of the dead out of her head. “Compared to some other old clans,” she muttered darkly.

  Meizhen drummed her fingers on her seat’s armrest before answering. “We know our duty, even if most do not do more than pay lip service to certain aspects. Mortals and lesser cultivators are,” Meizhen paused, trying to find the right word. “They are like children. It is an unfit guardian who allows them to be dragged under by lake beasts.”


  “What they do to each other is fine though.” Ling Qi laughed harshly. She wasn’t being fair, but she felt burnt out.

  “The metaphor breaks down,” Meizhen admitted without pause. “And yet, the sort of deliberate slaughter you spoke of at the end is the purview of barbarians. I can offer you little comfort, save that you will become accustomed to such violence. This world is cruel. If it bothers you, it is your duty as a cultivator to prevent its occurrence in reality, insofar as you are able.”


  “And now you sound like her,” Ling Qi sighed, looking toward Meizhen.

  Meizhen met her gaze. “The Bai are associated with that moon from time to time,” she said dryly. “More importantly, that is not the core of your trouble.”


  “Since when are you so perceptive about this kind of thing?” Ling Qi grumbled good-naturedly.

  “One must strive for excellence when carving one’s niche,” Bai Meizhen replied primly. “You regret what you see as cowardice, do you not?”


  Ling Qi didn’t answer. She hated what she had been made to do in that memory. She hated the nightmares it had brought her, but those horrible scenes were, as Meizhen and even the spirit had said, something that she could draw determination from. The hunt had been repellent and evil on every level. Whatever justifications had existed for it were nothing in the face of what it had wrought. She would strive to ensure that she would never see something like that again.

  No, what she really hated was that she hadn’t even tried to avert it. For all that she claimed to have grown above sacrificing friends and allies for her own wellbeing, when faced with impossible odds, she hadn’t even had the courage to try. It would be one thing if she had at least tried to persuade that monster to spare Shen Hu and been rebuffed; she would have just been angry and determined instead of…… this.

  “How can you call it anything else?” she asked.

  “There is nothing wrong with prioritizing yourself,” Meizhen answered, giving her a cool look. “So long as self-preservation is not your absolute highest consideration. Filial duty must come first, else we be no more than snapping, clawing beasts, but……” She shook her head. “Why do your actions trouble you so?”


  “It feels like I’m backsliding,” Ling Qi confessed. “I wonder if I would have stood by and remained silent if it had been you in the dream.”


  Meizhen fell silent as the figure of an elder Ling Qi did not know blinked into view below at the overseer’s table. “I trust you would not. Ling Qi, it seems to me that you must make it clear to yourself where your limits lie. Your trouble lies in a lack of surety.”


  Ling Qi did not reply. The challenge was starting.