Chapter 320: I Am Not Sorry
"At least, not romantic ones. I have never been in a relationship, meaning I haven't been accountable to anyone other than myself for over a decade now."
And he was right. If they had any shot at being able to be together functionally, they had a very long way to go.
"I guess we both have a lot to learn, huh?"
"We do," he agreed. "But the important thing is… I want to learn. Do you?"
All she had to do was look him in the eyes to know her answer. "Yes, I want to be married to you."
"Well, that's a start."
Instantly, Qian Meng felt a little better. She reminded herself that they didn't have to change overnight. Baby steps were okay as long as they were moving forward.
"Well, I have no doubt that we will be able to work through all of these obstacles. We are both obviously passionate about each other and committed to this relationship. We'll be able to do it," she said confidently. It was more like putting good things into the world. If she positively looked at the situation, they would have a better chance! "Let's start right now!" she demanded.
"What do you mean?"
"For a first," she picked up her menu and handed it to him. "You can order me some delicious food. And then you can tell me all about what you did after the funeral," she stated.
He looked at her in awe for a moment. "You're really bossy," he grumbled. "Okay."
He told her bit by bit about what he had done and her eyes sparkled with wonder. When he was done, she looked at him dreamily.
"You're a really dedicated man. Do you know that men are the sexiest when they work?" she told him. He chuckled softly.
"Is that so?"
"You even used your past experience to complete your best project ahead of time," she said promptly. "Now, that is a cunning businessman if I have seen one." She gave him a blinding smile. "But you also gave up a lot to do that," she said, her smile falling.
He looked at her curiously. "You haven't been sleeping a lot lately, and some of it has to do with me. So, even if you slow down a little, it won't change the future by a lot. Let's live a healthy and long life," she insisted.
He nodded enthusiastically. "What about the other things I did? The ones that enraged you?"
Ah, so he had brought it up once again.
She frowned. "You shouldn't have done those things. I know they harmed me in another world, but they didn't do it here. Maybe the outcome would have been different. They shouldn't be punished for the crimes they haven't committed yet, don't you think?" she asked.
He shook his head. "I did it because they were capable of doing it and worse. You made them hate you and they would have done something far worse sooner or later." He stopped. "Try to understand. It was all I could do to not literally kill them."
She clutched his hand in a tight grip.
"I understand. But you brought them into our relationship more than they already were," she insisted.
He exhaled. "I know it probably wasn't the best decision. I let my anger get the best of me. You were right. I convinced myself that what I was doing was in the name of protecting you, but it was about revenge. The more I have been able to destroy their lives, the better I felt about the whole thing. I will admit to it."
She rubbed small circles on the back of his hand. "And I thought I was the immature one."
"I'm sorry," he said automatically.
"No, you are not." She knew this for a fact.
He amended his statement quickly. "I am not sorry for what I am doing to the people who want to harm you. But I am sorry that it hurt you."
She shook her head in disbelief. "You are just telling me that you won't stop going after them. Is that it?"
"Yes. But this time, I will inform you about the results. You won't have to find out in a way that hurts you or makes you suspicious of me."
What else could she expect? The fact that he was willing to share the dark side of him was enough for her. For now.
Actually, Qian Meng hadn't noticed that the restaurant they were sitting in was quite romantic. It was amusing to see the bodyguard ready for threats when the lights in the restaurant were dim and couples filled the tables.
She watched the waiter on their way back, carrying their glasses and plates of food.
Qian Meng couldn't keep the smile off her face when the meal was placed in front of them. They began eating and it turned out to be amazing. The circulation in the restaurant was nothing short of nice and the scent of food wafted through the air gently. It all provided an ambiance of complete perfection. Maybe it was not the place at all, but the man sitting with her. It felt like a dream to be with him.
They both ate quickly, in relative silence. They were both famished after a long day of work and battling out their emotions. And the food was so good that they scarfed it down. Once they were finished, their plates scraped clean, they lingered.
They sipped on the cocktail Mo Qingchen had ordered. They looked out of the restaurant into the streets where people still walked without pause. The candle between them still burned, illuminating their faces and giving them a warm glow. Mo Qingchen looked especially beautiful under its warm embrace.
"Can I say that this is the best trip I have ever been on?" she sighed happily.
Mo Qingchen raised his brow. "Better than Bora Bora?"
Their honeymoon had been excellent, but this was different. She had always wanted a vacation and it was wonderful to travel, but this was much more exciting in several ways.