Here, a little distance away from the palace, there was a suffocating atmosphere .

  Walking up the stairs, we were greeted by the sight of a room surrounded by a metal cage .

  “This is the place, Iris . ”


  There was a woman standing where Lady Letticia pointed .

  I inhaled sharply at the sight of her .

  Of course she still looked like herself, but in another way she was completely different .

  Skinny, dry-haired, dull skin, and eyes red from crying that just stared upwards .

  “It’s been a long time, Lady Yuri . ”


  Considering I couldn’t show my shock through my voice, I purposefully spoke to her in a calm tone .

  “It’s been a while, Lady Iris . ”


  She chuckled, looking at me .

  “Why did you summon me?”


  “Nothing . I just wanted to see you before I died . ”


  Her cold gaze and smile was something I’d never seen before, but it didn’t seem out of the ordinary on her face .

  Finally she was showing her true colors .

  “Are you satisfied then?”


  I smiled sarcastically too .

  “Who knows……it’s a little less interesting than I thought it would be . ”


  “Ah, this really is……”


  Why the hell did you call me here then? I didn’t ask the question on my mind .

  “Then can you let me ask you a few questions?”


  She didn’t confirm or deny, so I took that as acceptance .

  “Did you ever love Prince Edward?”


  “What’s the use in knowing that?”


  “Just curiosity . ”


  The moment I said that, she smiled .

  Her face was full of contempt for me as she opened her mouth wide .

  She looked almost scary, sending chills down my spine .

  “What are you saying? You don’t want to admit someone you’ve loved was stolen by a woman who just wanted to use him?”


  Well, look who suddenly became a lot more talkative .

  “You already know the answer to that . I worked on behalf of the Towair Kingdom to engulf this country in chaos, attacking the highest nobility in this nation . ”


  “Yes, that has become clear now . ”


  “How does that make you feel? He died to protect me, saying he died for the person he loved . He loved me . How does it feel to force him into engagement without really earning his love? You must be resentful . Hate me now……”


  Her words were sharp .

  But it felt like she wasn’t hurting me with her words . She was hurting herself .

  “Tell me you’re resentful……tell me you hate me!”


  She grabbed onto the bars of the cage .

  We were close enough to touch each other .

  “It’s like you’re saying you love him . ”


  She raised her head suddenly in response .

  “Ha? What the hell are you talking about?”


  Her condescending attitude made me laugh .

  “Am I wrong? What you said was basically a confession of love . That’s what it sounded like to me . ”


  She didn’t respond to what I said .

  I assumed she would respond with more verbal attacks to deny this, no matter what the truth was .

  I stared at her . And then tears began to flow from her eyes .

  She really did love him .

  Any words were less convincing than her current state .

  “W-what are you saying, I don’t understand . ”


  She lowered her head .

  Although I had been staring at her for a while, she didn’t seem inclined to budge at all .

  “I’ve never been resentful . Our engagement was something from the past . Our paths diverged then . No matter what happened to him from then on was not something I needed to know . ”


  When I said that she raised her head to glare at me .

  “Plus, Prince Edward selected you, the one whom he loved the most . No matter what you think about it, he protected the person he loved . He died happy . Out of mourning, it’s impossible to hate someone on behalf of not loving him . ”


  “Your expression of understanding is obnoxious . ”


  I cracked half a smile at her bitter words .

  “Even if you find it obnoxious……”


  “Ever since you were born, you’ve had everything! Money, status, people surrounding you . I hate you!”


  Screaming, she shook the cages so hard they groaned like they were crying .

  “And so you attack me?”


  “Hmph……it felt really good . ”


  She smiled happily . It was a dark smile .

  “Is that so . ”


  Thinking about the fact that this rationale was enough for her to pick on me like that, I felt the heat of anger rise in my chest .

  Frustrations differed by person and look so completely unusual to anyone on the outside .

  Even knowing that, I couldn’t forgive completely as the victim of the situation .

  “How are you different from me? I’m also beautiful, I’m also capable of gathering the hearts of others! To prove that, Prince Edward chose me! So why am I here now……”


  Her screeching broke the last thread maintaining my rationality .

  I raised my hand like I was going to slap her in the face .

  But even so, the cage between us made it impossible to reach her .

  In contrast, my hand struck the cage and ached immensely .

  The cage rattled, as if crying out on my behalf .

  What the hell was she doing……I’m sure everyone around me wore that expression . Even Yuri looked dumbfounded . My heart hurt more than my hand .

  “If I were the one to comment on it, I’d have to say I’m completely different from you . ”


  “What? Your position in society? Or your luck?”


  “Who the hell is going to talk about something like that? You only kept people around you to use them . I trust the people in my life . ”


  “What’s the difference!”


  Without hesitation I burst out laughing .

  It seems like this only aggravated her suffering . Her glare at me became even sharper .

  “Do you understand what I’m talking about? When you use someone, you abandon them easily whenever they’re causing you inconvenience . People who still approach you under those circumstances aren’t interested in placing their trust in you . They want to use you too . ”


  Somehow those words shut her up .

  Seems like I was right on .

  “Trust means believing in them and relying on them . You should only rely on people if you trust them . Trustworthy people are not replaceable in my life . If something happens, I’ll risk everything to protect them! So don’t you dare compare us . ”


  Because I was crying out in rage, my breathing became uneven .

  When I took a deep breath to calm myself, she spoke quietly .

  “Why……”


  Her voice was so quiet I didn’t hear it over the sound of my own breathing .

  “Why can you trust? After everything’s happened to you, you shouldn’t be able to trust anyone anymore . ”


  “Do you mean the engagement? Or the merchants’ guild? Or……”


  “Everything . But if I had to pick one, the engagement . The feeling of being thoroughly rejected by someone you love, and even your family turning against you . ”


  Her question was one I’d asked myself countless times . But somehow the question was almost humorous coming from her .

  “Yes . I did become afraid to trust . But my companions from the past have responded to me by saying it’s okay, that they’ll stay with me no matter what . It’s brought me out of my fearfulness . ”


  I had been afraid of trusting and then being betrayed again .

  My heart had been wounded so deeply .

  Because I was afraid of others seeing my weakness, I pretended to be fine .

  The people who tore that facade down was everyone I’d trusted since childhood and Dean .

  “I still fear people now, but I don’t think it’s a bad thing to trust . If I were paralyzed by the fear of trusting others, I’d be forgetting everything I went through with the important people in my life, when a little courage was enough to give me so much . ”


  I gazed at Tanya while I said this . She smiled proudly in response .

  “But you might be betrayed again……?”


  “Yes . It might happen . But living in fear of that means not moving forward . If you’re looking past beautiful things for the sake of fear, you’re only missing out . Plus, this world is not so gentle that people can live without getting hurt . The only thing you can do when you’re hurt is to keep living, keep surviving . ”


  “.……Yes . ”


  She laughed out loud as she said that .

  It was almost like a demon leaving her body .

  “In the end, I really do hate you after all . ”


  I couldn’t help but laugh too .

  “I don’t like you either . ”


  “That’s right . If you ever said you didn’t dislike me that would frankly be disgusting to me . ”


  “You’re right . ”


  We both smiled .

  “Hey……Iris, what does it mean to love someone?”


  “Who knows . It’s something you can’t explain . But if you feel like that person’s more special than anyone else……no matter what form that affection takes, I think that’s love . ”


  “Special……indeed . ”


  Her face, looking like it was about to burst into tears, twisting into a smile instead .

  “I’m an idiot . When I lost him, that’s when I realized he was something special to me . ”


  “You’re right . You are an idiot . ”


  I was still smiling . But thanks to her, I almost wanted to cry too .

  “There were so many opportunities for me to communicate that to him . But now it’s too late . I am, we really are idiots . ”


  When I said this, her eyes went wide .

  “I’m not talking about Prince Edward . Of course, I mourn his death too . ”


  “What are you mourning?”


  Her voice trembled when she asked .

  “For Prince Edward?”


  She nodded quietly .

  “Even if it’s someone you hated from the bottom of your heart, you can’t keep hating them after they die . Instead of bottling up your hatred, you might as well remember your good memories together . It’s better for the people who survive . That’s what my subordinate told me . Although I hated him from the bottom of my heart when he was alive, we had good memories too . Right now that means I can only pray for him . ”


  Her tears spilled forth .

  “I thought no one else in this world would still grieve him, after Queen Ellia and Marquis Maelia passed . And I……”


  “I will mourn him . Also, there might still be more people out there that you don’t know of who are mourning him . Humans are complex . We aren’t just single-sided . ”


  “Is that so……that’s great . I hope his name isn’t just something to mock . ”


  Watching her cry as she said this, I almost felt my tears flowing out too .

  That’s how she loved him in the end .

  She feared his name being associated with evil .

  Instead of thinking about herself, she cared more for his reputation . If that wasn’t love, what was it?

  “Iris, you should go home . Your majesty, I’ll tell you everything . ”


  When she finally managed to stop her tears, her expression was determined .

  “I see . It was good to see you, Lady Yuri . ”


  I had nothing more to say now .

  “Good to see you, Lady Iris . ”


  She smiled gently . It was a smile from her past .

  And with that I left .